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If You Really Want To Know

by Light The Avenue

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1.
Letters 01:00
2.
If you really want to know If you really care that much I'll lay it on the table And you can be the judge Say exactly what you're thinking That's always been your weakness That's always been your weakness I wish I noticed all your fucking motives From the sand to the streetlights, I still don't know where my home is You've got the ocean that tried to leave me broken The interstates, they separate my impulses from focus You never fail to turn the tables, it always fucks me up I redirect my instincts and you beat me to the punch How could you let this happen? That was my last shard of trust I'm a product of social anxiety and dysthymia Sometimes it's bearable, but it's never truly gone I've held the extra weight for months Now look what you've done I don't think I'm strong enough Don't think I ever was You're tossing bricks I'm paper thin Well I left you on the shoreline again this year But the voices get louder every day you're not here I spend hours on end just hoping that you see clear And I'm screaming in microphones with the hopes that you hear me there
3.
I saw the sunrise this morning, the first time in months I never remembered things being this calm If I held my reactions inside for the meantime I think I'd feel shiftless, devoided, and wrong That's when I ran down from Thompson Hill I felt like disappearing People don't know how it feels People never notice anything But the melody still rings And it sounds like gold When am I ever gonna start to get better? This place is a trainwreck, everyone is the same When am I ever gonna say what I want to? When I state my opinions, they just turn me away How in the hell am I supposed to be stable when the people around me always want me to change? I don't mean to seem to be completely despondent But I'm trying to deal with the rejection I face Life's a game that you play by the rules (There's no game, there's no game) You can burn the photographs But you can't burn the memories You can just forget me
4.
Nine months ago I managed to get past all my grief To learn to love the world again and see a different side of things I always left the light on You always stumbled in I never wanted to see you like that Not now, not ever again Collect my references and force a resolution Take me to the tree line and shoot me like a dog Close up these battle wounds, it hurts to keep them open I think the both of us have suffered quite enough I'm running on nothing but fumes You think I've got this misconstrued What happens when you just assume? Your words get considered; my life resumes Every time I take a first step, I'm always on my last leg It's funny how things end up like that The earth it shakes with every time I break When the good in this shines, you know the light always finds it's way of dimming out Rip up the letters, pretend it never happened I apologize. I'm learning how to clutch. And now I wonder if I'll ever learn my lesson You can never trust anyone that much Selfish is as selfish was It's not a grudge, it's not a grudge Inconsistent, treacherous It's not a grudge, it's not a grudge
5.
I guess I couldn't take the disapproval But I tried to understand the closed, one-sided minds that always Try to force feed all their beliefs on to those who seem to be just fine And they think they know exactly what I need I am twice the man I was when I believed it Things change. That's what happened when I learned to think for myself And I won't try to stop them. They have something to put hope in But I don't fucking need it At least for now I'm fine where I am (If Christ himself was to walk to earth, and to claim headship, without a doubt the pope would crucify him again) (Fronz) Hell yeah I'm doing just fine, I'm just taking my time Making progress, using everything I have in my mind You can follow your religion and stay in line But I'm a rebel and I'm happy and I'm doing alright Redemption is a virtue But it's one that I've never had So I've closed that book and I'm never going back And I won't be scared 'Cause I'm proud of who I am and who I've become (Max Stringer) A wise man once said always collect all your debts And I'm never going back Not not, not ever And if he's really there, I think that God would understand He's been doing this for years now He's probably quite a decent man I know he's been through this already Reaching out to hands not there He knows some people just aren't ready And some have already escaped So I'm walking to a chapel just to see if things might change I will ask him for forgiveness for things I still do every day An old man stops me in my tracks Says, "Son I've seen your type before. You are young. You have everything, and still you're wanting more. I had two children and a wife, and a big house on a hill. I lost everything in a fire. Someday you might know how it feels to have to come here every day to get on your knees and pray just to feel a bit more confident that you might see them again. My hands are not that clean. I've picked up a lot of dirt. And if I were to die right now, I'd probably get my just deserve. But I miss my family, and I know they're not in hell. So I ask god every day just for some guidance and some help." Then he looked me in the eyes and said, "saviors are for those who can't save themselves".
6.
7.
Damaged 03:47
The truth this time As if I haven't been truthful for once in my life A year seemed longer than it used to Than I'm used to So... Maybe I'll take my chances again It seemed to work fine last time for a while And I don't think I'm broken yet I'm just damaged I'm damaged but I still function I'm still not sure what I want But I know what my doubts mean Spent a while not even searching One last summer by the sea I hope you took my words to heart And brought them everywhere you went I hope you show your face in light someday I'd say it all over again I'd rebuild the places you've been
8.
I've got a way with words that's always bound to leave you speechless You're playing all of these games that I've already beaten I'm sick and tired of writing letters 'Cause you don't even read them About all of your stupid flaws Now you won't ever see them I took a shot in the dark to try to figure it out To try to cope with the dread that comes along with the doubt And I think that's why I'm always like this I think that's why I always... You've got your hands full, I've got my strings tuned You're making phone calls in public restrooms I've got a feeling that I deserve this But it's not appealing when you close the curtains Now... I'm spending hours in this old backyard looking for a hint of nostalgia And I think that I've been gone so long that the memories were all burnt up So I'm trying, I swear that I am Digging up the roots that built me up into a kid that's got a lot of purpose But waits around until the moment's perfect You've got your hands full, I've got my strings tuned You're making phone calls in public restrooms I've got a feeling that I deserve this But it's not appealing when you close the curtains I had my head straight, I had my road paved You kept your secrets, you kept your bed made And I'm packing all my things for the seven seven oh my god This place will never be my home When you took the stand Overly confident I'm not complaining I've got nothing to say Just go, just leave
9.
Take this message, read it thoroughly and forward it to everyone I didn't let this happen on my own watch My progression has nothing to do with solitude I've got some things to figure out I've got some things that I have to get off my chest And I'll be back soon I hope that you understand That this kills me too But it makes me a better man Remember when you told me, "Son, risks don't work for everyone. We all have different gifts from God. If yours can change the world, let them unfold". The clock moves fast now that I'm finally gone So leave this message for everyone The pain comes in waves, and if you try to hold on, before it's too late the current rips you apart And I'll be back soon I hope that you understand That this kills me too But it makes me a better man If you want the truth I never really had any plans It left me nicked up and bruised But I just feel like this is something I have to do This kills me too

about

This album was self funded and we hope to bring it to as many people as possible! Thanks for checking us out and being apart of our journey!

credits

released October 15, 2013

Drew Garehime at Burden Studios, Open Minded Records, PR Nicole Ginyard, PR Brittany Ginyard, Shelby Short at 152 Productions, Rara Bunting at Friends Stay True Booking, and anybody who as ever booked us/supported us/gave us a chance to do what we love.

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Light The Avenue Atlanta, Georgia

We are a 4 piece Rock/Punk/Emo band coming out of Atlanta, Ga. Debut EP "The Earth Was Blue, But There Was No God" out now.

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