1. |
Letters
01:00
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2. |
Tossing Bricks
05:01
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If you really want to know
If you really care that much
I'll lay it on the table
And you can be the judge
Say exactly what you're thinking
That's always been your weakness
That's always been your weakness
I wish I noticed all your fucking motives
From the sand to the streetlights, I still don't know where my home is
You've got the ocean that tried to leave me broken
The interstates, they separate my impulses from focus
You never fail to turn the tables, it always fucks me up
I redirect my instincts and you beat me to the punch
How could you let this happen? That was my last shard of trust
I'm a product of social anxiety and dysthymia
Sometimes it's bearable, but it's never truly gone
I've held the extra weight for months
Now look what you've done
I don't think I'm strong enough
Don't think I ever was
You're tossing bricks
I'm paper thin
Well I left you on the shoreline again this year
But the voices get louder every day you're not here
I spend hours on end just hoping that you see clear
And I'm screaming in microphones with the hopes that you hear me there
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3. |
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I saw the sunrise this morning, the first time in months
I never remembered things being this calm
If I held my reactions inside for the meantime
I think I'd feel shiftless, devoided, and wrong
That's when I ran down from Thompson Hill
I felt like disappearing
People don't know how it feels
People never notice anything
But the melody still rings
And it sounds like gold
When am I ever gonna start to get better?
This place is a trainwreck, everyone is the same
When am I ever gonna say what I want to?
When I state my opinions, they just turn me away
How in the hell am I supposed to be stable
when the people around me always want me to change?
I don't mean to seem to be completely despondent
But I'm trying to deal with the rejection I face
Life's a game that you play by the rules
(There's no game, there's no game)
You can burn the photographs
But you can't burn the memories
You can just forget me
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4. |
Not Now, Not Ever
04:40
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Nine months ago I managed to get past all my grief
To learn to love the world again and see a different side of things
I always left the light on
You always stumbled in
I never wanted to see you like that
Not now, not ever again
Collect my references and force a resolution
Take me to the tree line and shoot me like a dog
Close up these battle wounds, it hurts to keep them open
I think the both of us have suffered quite enough
I'm running on nothing but fumes
You think I've got this misconstrued
What happens when you just assume?
Your words get considered; my life resumes
Every time I take a first step, I'm always on my last leg
It's funny how things end up like that
The earth it shakes with every time I break
When the good in this shines, you know the light always finds it's way of dimming out
Rip up the letters, pretend it never happened
I apologize. I'm learning how to clutch.
And now I wonder if I'll ever learn my lesson
You can never trust anyone that much
Selfish is as selfish was
It's not a grudge, it's not a grudge
Inconsistent, treacherous
It's not a grudge, it's not a grudge
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5. |
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I guess I couldn't take the disapproval
But I tried to understand the closed, one-sided minds that always
Try to force feed all their beliefs on to those who seem to be just fine
And they think they know exactly what I need
I am twice the man I was when I believed it
Things change. That's what happened when I learned to think for myself
And I won't try to stop them.
They have something to put hope in
But I don't fucking need it
At least for now I'm fine where I am
(If Christ himself was to walk to earth, and to claim headship, without a doubt the pope would crucify him again)
(Fronz) Hell yeah
I'm doing just fine, I'm just taking my time
Making progress, using everything I have in my mind
You can follow your religion and stay in line
But I'm a rebel and I'm happy and I'm doing alright
Redemption is a virtue
But it's one that I've never had
So I've closed that book and I'm never going back
And I won't be scared
'Cause I'm proud of who I am and who I've become
(Max Stringer) A wise man once said always collect all your debts
And I'm never going back
Not not, not ever
And if he's really there, I think that God would understand
He's been doing this for years now
He's probably quite a decent man
I know he's been through this already
Reaching out to hands not there
He knows some people just aren't ready
And some have already escaped
So I'm walking to a chapel just to see if things might change
I will ask him for forgiveness for things I still do every day
An old man stops me in my tracks
Says, "Son I've seen your type before. You are young. You have everything, and still you're wanting more. I had two children and a wife, and a big house on a hill. I lost everything in a fire. Someday you might know how it feels to have to come here every day to get on your knees and pray just to feel a bit more confident that you might see them again. My hands are not that clean. I've picked up a lot of dirt. And if I were to die right now, I'd probably get my just deserve. But I miss my family, and I know they're not in hell. So I ask god every day just for some guidance and some help."
Then he looked me in the eyes and said, "saviors are for those who can't save themselves".
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6. |
I Still Function
03:45
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7. |
Damaged
03:47
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The truth this time
As if I haven't been truthful for once in my life
A year seemed longer than it used to
Than I'm used to
So...
Maybe I'll take my chances again
It seemed to work fine last time for a while
And I don't think I'm broken yet
I'm just damaged
I'm damaged but I still function
I'm still not sure what I want
But I know what my doubts mean
Spent a while not even searching
One last summer by the sea
I hope you took my words to heart
And brought them everywhere you went
I hope you show your face in light someday
I'd say it all over again
I'd rebuild the places you've been
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8. |
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I've got a way with words that's always bound to leave you speechless
You're playing all of these games that I've already beaten
I'm sick and tired of writing letters
'Cause you don't even read them
About all of your stupid flaws
Now you won't ever see them
I took a shot in the dark to try to figure it out
To try to cope with the dread that comes along with the doubt
And I think that's why I'm always like this
I think that's why I always...
You've got your hands full, I've got my strings tuned
You're making phone calls in public restrooms
I've got a feeling that I deserve this
But it's not appealing when you close the curtains
Now...
I'm spending hours in this old backyard looking for a hint of nostalgia
And I think that I've been gone so long that the memories were all burnt up
So I'm trying, I swear that I am
Digging up the roots that built me up into a kid that's got a lot of purpose
But waits around until the moment's perfect
You've got your hands full, I've got my strings tuned
You're making phone calls in public restrooms
I've got a feeling that I deserve this
But it's not appealing when you close the curtains
I had my head straight, I had my road paved
You kept your secrets, you kept your bed made
And I'm packing all my things for the seven seven oh my god
This place will never be my home
When you took the stand
Overly confident
I'm not complaining
I've got nothing to say
Just go, just leave
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9. |
Please Forward
04:54
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Take this message, read it thoroughly and forward it to everyone
I didn't let this happen on my own watch
My progression has nothing to do with solitude
I've got some things to figure out
I've got some things that I have to get off my chest
And I'll be back soon
I hope that you understand
That this kills me too
But it makes me a better man
Remember when you told me, "Son, risks don't work for everyone. We all have different gifts from God. If yours can change the world, let them unfold".
The clock moves fast now that I'm finally gone
So leave this message for everyone
The pain comes in waves, and if you try to hold on, before it's too late the current rips you apart
And I'll be back soon
I hope that you understand
That this kills me too
But it makes me a better man
If you want the truth
I never really had any plans
It left me nicked up and bruised
But I just feel like this is something I have to do
This kills me too
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Light The Avenue Atlanta, Georgia
We are a 4 piece Rock/Punk/Emo band coming out of Atlanta, Ga. Debut EP "The Earth Was Blue, But There Was No God" out now.
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